Sweaty!

Sweaty!

Drops on my face from yours

It bleeds from every pore,

From my head to toe it seeps

Oozes on my slippery feet!

Exudes as my glands secrete -

Not so easy to keep discreet!

Down my back it leaves trickles

Leaving sweaty rivers as it ripples

And from my brow it drips,

Wipe off my salty tasting lips.

Burning up and boiling hot

Smelling like I'm on the rot;

Feeling like my body leaks

Perspired and my armpits reek!

All my clothes are soaked through

My socks are slipping in my shoe.

As slimy saline has escaped -

Feel so hot and oven baked!

Drink more water, keep hydrated

But need the loo and feel inflated.

It's sticky, stuffy and just not fair

As the wax has melted on my hair!

From humidity there's no escape

It's clammy, close, I'm feeling faint.

As a lady, I'll work and glow

But please excuse me if I'm slow.....

Copyright Linda Lawrence

28th June 2011

And furthermore (Song)

And furthermore

(Chorus) Didn’t think a heart could break anymore,

Didn’t think that words would grate furthermore,

Can’t stand the silences or the wait anymore,

Didn’t think a heart could ache even more.

Don’t understand this invisible mess

Still trying to untangle and digest.

Trying to think of what is best -

The pills are doing all the rest.

Want to walk, need to talk,

Want to know what is at fault?

Deep in thought, want to sort

Because our life here is very short.

Too late for souls passed and gone;

Can’t undo what’s been said and done.

The answers’ in this bottle of wine

So just for now, all is fine.

These words are coming fast and strong

State of mind is weakened by prose and song.

You may think this is far-fetched

But my heart now is over-stretched.

Am waiting here all patiently,

The tears don’t stop, they fall freely.

Just want you to share some life with me!

Is that asking too much – do you agree?

  

This imaginations’ running overtime

Where have you gone..................?

So just of late, where is your time

So you could give me piece of mind?

You seldom now pick up the phone?

Dial our number –we’re always home.

Arrange to meet arrange to greet

And give this heart a healthier beat.

Copyright Linda Lawrence
Sung by Dave Richie who renamed it 'Furthermore'
8th May 2011

Tits Up!

Tits Up!

So how do you relax a tit?
How to avoid sleeping on it?
A muscle I've strained
A pectoral has been sprained -
And for work I'm now unfit!

Does it nestle into a sling?
Does it snuggle into anything?
It's an odd kind of place
Between cotton and lace -
The bra that holds everything!

I've somehow hurt my breast,
My boob's now got to rest,
But in what position
And shape or transition?
So what kind of posture is best?

In my boob I'm rubbing gel
From the chemist that they sell.
Going to have a tipple
To help aid my nipple
Tits up - what the hell!

Linda Lawrence
(Not even worth a copyright!)

5th May 2011

Can't give it away!

Can’t give it away

Would you care for some passata

With your starter?

Yeah, I know it’s hellish

But how about some cucumber relish –

Before they all perish?

Or some lettuce with pickle?

Now let’s not be fickle!

Eat some with your dinner

(You might well become thinner)

Along with some tomato sauce -

With your high tea of course!

Think there are plenty of bean sprouts

From our euro friends the crouts

For a late evening gnaw

That crawls with e coli galore

To serve at every meal

That might make you feel ill....

Well that’s the news for today

You can’t even give this lot away.

Copyright Linda  Lawrence

7^th June 2011