I needed to cry

I needed to cry

I don't lie

I needed to cry 

The floodgates opened

Very wide

The tears come

My feelings undone

Today they begun

Time overrun 

Can't remember date

For the last floodgate

Never too late

To shed the weight 

Of worry and fear 

Just lately that appeared 

Some things unclear

2025 was a troubled year

Of worry , concern

Life, as it was upturned 

Things were learned 

Some with discern

Kept calm, held it in

Tried to put it in the bin

Tried to take it on the chin

But now deep within 

The tears have flowed 

Been feeling low

They had nowhere to go

At last out poured the overload

No rain

 

No rain

 

I will think again 

About losing this oestrogen. 

Am dry in and out 

My skin looks like grout

It's like a garden that has no rain.

 

My body, it looks a mess

In the dark I get undressed.

Keep feeling hot ,

Covered in rashes and spots ,

It's not just about missing a breast.

 

They say the side effects 

Can leave you tired and wrecked,

But the drug benefits 

Outweigh the negatives 

But don't know what else to expect.

 

Life has been turned on its head

Spending more time in bed.

Irritable and itchy,

At times very bitchy 

Emotions overtaken by dread.

 

Any treatment received, am glad,

Overall, not doing so bad!

Now the daily meds

And what lies ahead

Can't help but feel so sad.

 

My energy level’s decreased

But got my marbles at least!

My body has tightened

Can’t help feeling frightened,

The radiation will soon be unleashed.

 

Trying to stay on the bright side,

Smile through bleary eyes.

So frightened inside

But not even cried,

At times try to brush it aside.

 

Now a little fresh blood 

Not normal but wasn't a flood.

I feel so afraid 

And a little dismayed,

Wilting like a flower bud.

 

It's almost gone, the rain 

How quickly it has drained.

No love, no passion,

Like it's gone out of fashion 

It will never be back again.

 

Copyright Linda Lawrence

31/01/2026

Hannah

 

Hannah

 

You've been so supportive and strong for others,

A lovely wife and wonderful mother.

You've seen illness and used your tough love ,

Now the shoe is on the other foot and I'll give you a shove!

 

Am pushing my own treatment aside , worried how you're feeling 

Your radiotherapy is part of your rouge cell healing.

Every laser is killing unwanted invasion 

And hope my attitude will help with some persuasion!

 

You may feel sore and feel some pain 

But for you , so many more years you've gained !

Thank goodness - we can't do without your smile-

To make us laugh , while you hairstyle!

 

So lovely Hannah ,you're allowed to be scared 

You've endured so much, understand and to be fair.

You're very much loved and with such a great prognosis 

In 2026 you'll turn your back on your '25 diagnosis.

 

Please take radiotherapy on the chin.

Even if it burns your skin.

Think of it as killing your evil 

And next year won't be such an upheaval .

 

Linda xx

 

Christmas 2026

 Christmas 2026                                              

 

Eaten too much , feel like a pig in a blanket,
The processco, the wine , the Baileys, we drank it!
Filled with chocolate and Quality street
After eating the leftover Christmas meat!

The wishbone and the parsons' nose,
The only things that were disposed ,
The red cabbage with apple is best of all
Mixed in with pudding and alcohol.

And all the tastes from different cheese,
Doesn't help with the Christmas disease,
The beef , the turkey, the bacon ham,
All part of the big eat Christmas plan!

Crackers , snackers , really matters -
Goes well with all the Christmas platters!
We'll be fit to drop  if we don't go pop
And take all the tight clothes to the charity shop!

Brandy cream , so much in our bloodstream !

A detox will lure us to the extreme!

Mince pies, too. Many fries,
Seems like we've all grown out and sidewise!

Once a year, for a few days,
We all eat unhealthy in so many ways.
The parsnip, squash, carrot mixed in oil
The extra potatoes on the boil !

Pickled onions, red cabbage , Christmas cake,
What do our stomachs' look like for goodness sake!
Twiglets , nuts , rot in our guts
And tomorrow, we'll have the same in cold cuts!

Sweets, treats - just too much to eat! 

 

Sweets, treats – just too much to eat!

Keep on like this, we’ll all be obese

It’s got to a point where I can’t see my feet

Think ‘Christmas food should be made obsolete!

 

Copyright Linda Lawrence
Christmas 2025

 

Luna

 

In my lap, she curls and purrs, pretty girl 🐈‍⬛

Fur so soft, clean and washed 

It's her wish to fill her eating dish with tasty fish!

Soft and sweet, my heart beats, company complete.

My black beaut, very cute , so astute.

We should have adopted Luna much sooner!

But soon enough , this soft ball of fluff , can be quite tough

And very rough and her foodstuff, by the scruff 

Of its neck , I had to check ....

Her soft paws , now killer claws 

Mouth like jaws!

Pretty puss, what's lurking in the bush - is this an ambush?

Tight in your grip, licking your lips, as the blood drips.

Cat's sitting on the mat with a rat 

Rat's pawed, rat's gnawed, cat was bored 

Rat's dead, cat fed, organs widespread.

Had a play, near the doorway, now it's cast away.

Our gift! She insists! With a kiss!

Innocent eyes , rat's already died, but it wasn't dignified.

The rodent is potent, but our cat is very content .

 

Copyright Linda Lawrence

16/12/2026

Not wine, just tea!

 Not wine – just tea!

 

Laying in a hospital bed,

Looking over at others , looking like death.

Wonder what's wrong why are they here?

The same as me, they felt much fear .

 

Got mobile phone and a book 

Some words to write in a notebook .

Some wonderful nurses doing their inspections 

Looking after us with all our infections .

 

My CRP bloods were much too high,

Not 5 but 500 , so sky high!

Haven't felt that well at all,

The pain with it made me squall.

 

The blood and the watery pus 

Run out of me like a fast driven bus,

I lost so much but at last, flat 

And so relieved to have arrived at that.

 

Hooked up to good old IV

I've asked for wine - but just get tea!

The antibiotics doing their job

All cleverly given after that swab.

 

The night angels come and check

Regularly while we rest our heads .

And while their magic work their charm

We're being well looked after not coming to harm.

 

What we all didn't foresee 

Was the sepsis that got too close to me.

I could have got very ill

And thank the nurses for the pills 

 

And all the while, the cannula in my arm

With vital drugs that kill the germs

Between life and death threatening 

That deep veined needle carries within.

 

Just a thank you for your care

Your kindness , empathy, when I was scared

My stay in hospital , calm through and through 

And this was all because of you .

 

Copyright

Linda Lawrence 11/12/2025

Out of the blue

 Out of the blue

I said goodbye 

At the end of July 

The CAT and MRI

Could not deny.

Going to admit 

Lost a breast  

Had a biopsy

For a cancer test.

Invasive kind

A grade 2

Centimetre of ten

And out of the blue.

Must have been there 

Quite a while 

Some itching and puckering

Silent and hostile.

Thank goodness no chemo

But it spread to a gland 

Right under my armpit 

It had the upper hand.

There's been a few scares

Phycologically

Your mind takes over 

Illogically.

And all the tests 

They've given me

And further to treatment 

Radiotherapy. 

An infusion

To counteract 

Some unwanted side affects

They.ve got my back.

Now taking a drug

To keep it at bay 

My thanks to the NHS

They saved the day!

As for a protheses 

I knit my own!

The instructions I found 

A website on my phone .

If your body feels wrong 

Get it checked 

Don't leave it for long

Don't neglect.

Copyright Linda Lawrence 

November 2025